The 3 Things that Broke Me….

The 3 Things that Broke Me….

I’m broken.

Luckily though, like humpty dumpty, my pieces can be put back together again.

humptydumpty

However, it’s taking some time and some patience.

What I mean when I say I’m broken is that my body is not working properly.  As you know I’ve been struggling with fertility for well over a year now, have suffered two miscarriages and was recently diagnosed with hypothyroidism and a handful of other dysfunctions. Outwardly I look healthy (although a little heavier) and might even seem to be in great spirits but inwardly my body is broken.  The sad thing is that so many other women are in the same boat as me and don’t know it.  Or they do know it and have no idea how they got there. Understanding what led you down that path is key to recovery.  While it has taken me over a year to truly grasp what has happened to my body, I’m finally coming to terms with it and 100% focused on my healing.

So how did I break my body?

Here’s the three main things that led to my, let’s call them issues…

1.  Exercising too much

  11914698_race_0.5775916559457768.display

In particular, doing too much cardio.  For years I spent hours on end at the gym doing cardio, cardio and more cardio.  I would go to the gym after work, run 5 miles, take a cardio class then sometimes finish up with another cardio class…  Everyone else was doing it so I jumped right on board.  It wasn’t until after having The Love Nugget that I began learning about just how detrimental to my health too much cardio could be.    I listened to pod casts, read books and was told first hand that I should be walking and lifting heavy if I wanted to fix myself.  However, I was in denial for quite some time.  Ultimately it caught up with me and I’m finally learning to slow down and do less cardio.  Actually, to be quite honest these days I do slim to none!  I’ve been focusing on walking, lifting, and a little (talking a few jumping jacks, mt. climbers and burpees) cardio while teaching at The Studio.  I know now that my body does not react well to cardio 5 days a week let alone 2-3 days a week.  If only I had realized this sooner!

2. Not eating enough

photo

I spent years counting calories, logging my meals,  watching what I ate and starving myself.    Making sure to buy low fat, low calorie, sugar-free etc.  There were probably many consecutive years where I was eating below 1200 calories a day and burning well over 2000.  While I thought that I was healthy my body was fighting to survive.  After I had The Love Nugget my body started fighting back.  As I scrimped on my calories because I wanted to lose the baby weight, it held on to the fat in order to survive.   So I ate less and worked out more.  It wasn’t until I started eating Paleo that I began learning just how much my body needed calories, mainly fat to function properly.

Unfortunately it was too late.  The effects of all those years I spent trying to be skinny in the wrong ways caught up with me and it’s taking some time and effort to fix.  I’ve now learned that fat is good.  Like my body needs it to survive and to produce another human being.  While I might not look too thin on the outside evidently in order for me to function properly I need more fat.  I’ll admit that it sucks but I’m learning to embrace my curves rather than hate them.  After all, my ultimate goal is to be healthy and if that’s what it takes then I’m all for it!

3. Stress

Funny, when I look back at the past year of my life I don’t remember being stressed.   When I think of stress I think of something like this,

stressed-out_0

(Photo via business2community.com)

I never felt that I got to that point.  Even when our house flooded and we had to live in a hotel.  Or I had the second miscarriage.  Or when I found out I had hypothyroidism I never felt stressed.  However, we all react to stress differently.  When I look at everything that happened last year it’s easy to see that yes, there was a lot of stressful situations and events.  On top of those events, the pressure I was putting on myself to get pregnant, and not to mention all the cardio, my body had had enough.

So I’m working on destressing my life.  Focusing more on spending time relaxing by doing yoga, going for walks or taking a hot bath. Putting down the computer and reading a book or magazine.  Removing myself from stressful situations and even avoiding certain people who tend to be high strung or cause me to feel stressed.  All things I wish I had realized I should be doing sooner and maybe I wouldn’t not be in this situation.  Should have, would have, could have right?!?

Unfortunately these are not easy fixes.  It would be great if tomorrow I could wake up and be 100% unbroken.  Even 80% normal would be great!  However, knowing that it’s going to take some time makes the process a little easier.  Yes it’s frustrating at times that I haven’t had a menstrual cycle since May or that I’m still not pregnant while everyone else around me is announcing their happy news….  Despite those frustrations I’m remaining positive and patient that I will soon be fixed and will be able to say I’m healthy, happy and maybe soon, pregnant!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Comments

  1. Great read. It’s a very common trend that I see everywhere from several ‘healthy living’ blogs to real life and having been in this position too, I just want to scream when people mention any of these ways to lose weight as it really screws up the metabolism and our hormone balance.

  2. I wish there were more health articles that stressed how doing too much cardio can be detrimental to your health. Instead we get ones that only state the positives. It really is a shame because so many people, like myself as well, have suffered because of it. I also wish I could come give you the biggest hug possible & just remind you that your beautiful, sweet, amazing mom/wife, and you will be blessed. The thing is you just have to wait until God is ready. I know I’ve said that to you many times before and you may be tired of hearing it, but it’s true. Just keep your faith, Giselle.

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      Thank you Jessie! I always appreciate your kind words well wishes. I know you understand exactly where I’m coming from and it helps to know you have such a positive outcome in your situation. Which will be arriving soon!

  3. I have been reading your blog for a short time but this post just speaks too much to me. Those are the three things that have impacted my life at different moments in my life. I always seem to struggle with something and I have also thyroid issues to add to the basket.
    I truly think that being aware of it is the biggest step to change. Having the answer just lets you know where you need to go. It may take longer but you know the way out.
    Sending you lots of love!! Xx

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      Thank you so much for reading and commenting! It’s amazing how much an answer can help you change a situation. You are so right, it may take longer but at least I know the way out 🙂 Thank you again Elsie!

  4. Unfortunately its all too common for women to do these things. Its so good that you have recognized the areas that may have led you to where you are now and are working on getting better. Thanks for sharing this, its so important for people to understand how detrimental some of these habits can be.

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      You’re right it is so common for women to do these things and unfortunately there isn’t enough people out there discussing how over exercise can negatively impact your body. Hopefully some day it will be more well known 🙂

  5. Sounds like my life to a T lol. I want to get my thyroid tested but my doctor wasn’t keen on the idea. I go to a naturopath in January and I’m hoping she will be open to it.

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      Fingers crossed your naturopath is more help! I’m sure they will be. Mine sure was! Do you know what tests to ask for? It’s important to ask for freeT4, freeT3 and antibodies but they’ll probably do this. Most endo’s and regular docs only test THS and miss that the thyroid is under or over functioning in the T4/T3 area. Hoping you get some answers soon! Message me if you ever want to vent, have any questions or just want to chat. I know how frustrating it can be!

  6. I honestly didn’t know too much cardio was not good. This isn’t my issue, but thanks for sharing your heart and your knowledge. Hang in there 🙂

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      Yes, cardio can be a huge issue with women’s fertility. I just wish I would have learned this sooner!

  7. Hang in there Giselle. I love your honestly, and it sounds like you’ve come so far from where you were before! I hope things work out and you get some good news soon 🙂

  8. I hope you’re feeling better soon. So glad that you’re taking good care of yourself and your family.

  9. Ohhh man, I really feel for you with all of this! I hope you are able to de-stress in general as obviously that’s not good for general healthy, but also that you are able to conceive soon. You’re positive attitude is really inspirational though. While these topics are definitely a bit heavier than reading recipes 😉 I also think it’s so important to talk about and inform other people. I never thought about cardio having a negative impact on conception, and I’m sure a lot of others didn’t either.
    Again, best of luck!!

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      thank you! I’m definitely working on de-stressing and have been feeling much better! I didn’t realize how much of a negative impact cardio could have on fertility but now I know that it has a huge impact on it.

  10. It sounds like you have a great perspective and attitude about it all. Keep your head up, my friend. You’re amazing! Different circumstances to some degree, but you know I can relate to these feelings of the gaining weight and seeing my body change, the waiting, and the frustrations. But I’m confident it WILL happen in God’s perfect timing. It sounds like you’re doing everything right. Keep it up! xoxo

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      Thank you Ashley! I know you can relate and knowing that others have had similar struggles always helps me feel a little less alone. Thank you for sharing your journey with us all as it’s definitely helped me as well as many others 🙂

  11. It’s great to read that you’ve grown to take a different approach to health and fitness. My heart is with you in regards to fertility — it sounds like you are in a healthier place, though 🙂

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      Thank you Jess! I’m definitely in a much healthier place these days. It may have taken me years but I’m so grateful to have finally discovered a better health!

  12. Sending you my thoughts and prayers. I feel guilty when you visit my corner of the internet knowing how much you’re hoping to have another baby. You’re so very gracious and supportive with my baby updates, and I wish more then anything to visit you and read your own happy news! It sounds like your mindset is in the right place, and I’m positive your baby will come soon!

    It’s sad that some of the most popular HLB’s are the most dysfunctional and disordered. It’s why I’m struggling with what my niche truly is. I hope that the more people like you voice your struggles, the more we’ll see a change in blog land. <3

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      Thank you Jenny and please don’t feel guilty! I love reading your baby updates 🙂 Hopefully soon you’ll be reading mine!
      Remaining honest and true on my blog has always been a huge thing for me and I too hope more people do the same! It’s important for others to see the good, bad and ugly because that’s what’s real in everyone’s life.

  13. Sending a hug <3 The best thing is that you have realized it, and are on the road to recovering from all of it. It takes time when we hurt our body, but many go even more years without realizing it.

  14. Love and hugs! When you know better, you do better. You are doing better — it will work out. I’m wishing all the very best for you!

  15. Thank you for sharing all this information. There are so many women in the same boat and I’m sure your post will help so many people. My body handles stress poorly and it messes me up for days and sometimes months. I agree that getting rid of all the stressors is important. I always try to take time for myself each day to do something that makes me feel good.

    Great post! xoxo

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      It hasn’t always been easy being so open but yes, hopefully my posts will help someone someday 🙂 It’s so good to learn what your stressors are and how your body reacts to stress. What one person can handle just fine someone else might not so listening to your body over magazines, peers, etc. is so huge!

  16. Love, prayers and hugs! And thanks for sharing so openly and honestly.

  17. oh yes, it’s something i think almost ALL women do. And we are naive about. I know i was after i had my parasite. Health issues, stress, too much teaching, etc. Working on it all, always. Nourish the broken. repair. heal.

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      It’s just so hard for us women to slow down and focus on ourselves. I’m getting much better at relaxing and taking time for me that doesn’t necessarily include exercising. It’s hard but it’s so good too!

  18. I recently discovered your blog and am really enjoying it. I can relate to all of these issues. I still battle an obsession with cardio, but it’s hard to fit it in with my three young kids. I wish I could get to a place where I’m okay skipping a day… slowly I feel like I’m improving. I’m trying to focus on eating healthy and just movement (like walking, cleaning, etc.) to feel good and not counting calories so I can make sure my exercise cancels out the junk. Do you mind sharing some helpful research you’ve encountered on the dangers of too much cardio? Thanks for being so open!

    • Giselle Schroer says:

      THanks for reading! It’s crazy how hard it is for many of us to slow down and cut back on cardio. I believe most that reason is because we were told for so many years to eat less and move more. Now I try to follow the “eat more and move less” mentality to better my health but it’s definitely not easy! Most the information I get is from podcasts such as Balanced Bites, Everyday Paleo and Wellness mamma. The paleo community really stresses an overall wellbeing of health by, as I just mentioned, eating more and moving less. More walking, less high intensity workouts, and eating more wholesome foods including fats which was a big change for me. There’s some great information on Ashley’s blog about amnorrhea which is what many women who overdo cardio struggle from and which can directly effect fertility. Hope that helps 🙂

  19. You are such a strong woman Giselle! To be able to share parts of ourselves so openly takes such courage. I know that your words have impacted those around me so positively in their times of need. You have been thrown so many curve balls this past year and I am hoping with all hope that the New Year brings good new to you and your family.

  20. I’m just so proud of you for sharing all this. Giselle you are beautiful strong caring woman, and best mom I know. I think so many things, in our lives as we grow up play such a big part in how we think about ourselves. Giselle you have done so many things to change not only yourself but your families health. I love all the comment’s for your readers and friends, you all support each other.
    I love you, be patient you will be fine, you are surrounded by love and support.

  21. Catching up on some blog reading finally (So far behind!) and just read this now. It’s brave of you to open up about this and I’m sure helpful to many others who can identify. I’m working on finding a balance in my workouts, especially since I’ve started teaching Pilates 5 days a week. It makes it challenging to fit in the lifting and cardio that I need to stay in my best shape (for me, I need a few cardio sessions a week–I like two quick HIIT and one longish and steady). I’ve definitely upped my healthy fat intake, especially now that I read so many healthy living blogs. Sometimes I wonder if I’m eating too much healthy fat, though. My weight is up for sure and my shape has changed, but I’m having a hard time determining if that’s something I need to change or if it’s a healthy thing. It’s a tricky thing to figure out.

    Sending you hugs. Good for you for taking care of yourself and I hope your body heals itself up nicely.