The Mom I want to Be

The Mom I want to Be

Lately the love nugget and I have been battling daily. Numerous fits, time outs, frustration and tiredness pretty much every day. I could blame it on the fact that we’ve been living in a hotel for three months. That he’s giving me a taste of the terrible threes. Or that he just likes to push my buttons. To me placing blame in this situation is a cop out. Instead I’m choosing to hold myself accountable and realize that I haven’t been patient, present or the mom I truly want to be.

So today I’m pledging to change my parenting in a positive way and be more of the mom I want to be.

The mom who when my son asks to work on his “aptibity” (activity) book with him I don’t say, “In a minute honey I’m working.”

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The mom who ignores the mile long to do list to take her son for a walk and search for lizards.

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The mom who puts down her phone at the park and swings with her child.

The mom who embraces the hot temperatures and takes her son to the splash pad to run in the water even if that means she has to sit and sweat in the heat. photo 2 (32)

The mom who despite hating playing cars or trains sits down for ten minutes, 30 minutes or even an hour to drive them, crash them, and indulge in boy fun.

The mom who instead of taking five minutes to put on makeup before leaving the house spends the five minutes reading a book, playing a game, or making silly faces.

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The mom who schedules play dates, outings, and other fun adventures with friends.

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The kind of mom who might be running late but drives to the airfield to search for Dusty the Cropduster because her son thinks he saw him fly by.

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  The mom who puts aside her OCD with messes and spends time playing with moon dough.  One of the messiest things ever!!!

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The kind of mom who doesn’t freak out because she finds her son playing naked in the sprinkler with no sun screen on but laughs with him as splashes in the water.

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The mom who is full heartedly present in her child’s life.

Yes, we get busy.  Yes, life throws curve balls at you that take you out of your routine, or in our case even out of your house.  Yes, we have other obligations, commitments, and priorities.  However, life moves quickly.  In just a few months my little man will be entering Pre-school.  Then before I know it Kindergarten….  Then Jr. High…  Then College!!!!    So taking the time to slow down and be present in his life right now is something that is so important to me.  I know it will have a positive impact on his behavior and our relationship.

So I’m taking the opportunity today to pledge to be a better mom.

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 One that I’ll be able to look back on someday and be proud of 🙂

QUESTIONS – 

  • If you’re a mom, do you find that your children act out more when  you aren’t paying enough attention to them?   
  • How often do you evaluate yourself as a parent when your child is acting out? 
  • Interested in taking the pledge with me?  Feel free to join in!  
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Comments

  1. Aww…for the record, I think you’re an amazing mom. I totally admire your commitment to being present, but you still deserve to do things for yourself too (like take 5 minutes to put on makeup–I always feel so much better with “my face on,” I just can’t help it!).

    All I’ve been hearing lately is that the 3’s are much worse than the 2’s, and I shouldn’t get too comfortable! So I can imagine that this is a tricky time, especially given the difficult hotel situation. The Love Nugget is a lucky kiddo to have a mom who cares as much as you do. 🙂

  2. I actually got goosebumps and teared up reading this. So beautiful.

  3. I must say don’t be hard on yourself you are a great mom. It’s amazing how 10 min. of quality time spent with a 3 year old is so much better for them then 2 hours in front of the tv. The dishes and dirty floors can wait, it’s ok if you have to lay down with him, to make him take a nap. It’s ok if you nap too, because he keeps you up at night and you both need naps and down time. Time just goes faster and faster, he will grow up, no stopping that. Enjoy him everyday!
    I love you Giselle I know I say this too much, but your little love nugget is so much like you were when you were little.

  4. ErikaMC says:

    Yes, I notice that my attitude does effect my son’s and I also notice that his sitter’s does too. You can tell when it’s been a stressful day at daycare. Bedtime is super putzy and I get frustrated so then it takes even longer but if I just let myself go with it the whole process is much smoother – it’s just hard to remember that sometimes. It’s a great lesson for all of us to sit back and try to do.

  5. Alyssa McClelland says:

    Love this post!! This is something that I have been spending time on myself lately! If you ever have time to read you would like the book Hands Free Mama. It’s all about being in the present.

  6. I applaud your determination. As a working mother of two fine young men now (21 & 26) I made this pledge many times……….let’s see 21 or 26 times 52 = LOTS of attempts! Life steps in and even your son needs space……..The best pledge you can make is to LOVE him, embrace him and always makes sure he knows you’re there!!

  7. Just what I needed to read today! You are a fabulous mom! So glad you are back in your house now!

  8. Yes! It is like you are in my head today!

  9. Such a beautiful post. However, please don’t forget about how amazing of a Mother you aleady are as wel <3

  10. I agree with so much of this post. I really try at home to put the phone away and just spend time with the kiddo – I get a little upset at the hubby when he is ‘watching’ the kid and hubby is just tapping away at the iPad. These moments are so fleeting and soon they will be all grown up and graduated and having families of their own!

  11. I love this Giselle! I can very much relate to it. Even as Kenzer has been getting older and more and more self-sufficient, I’m always reevaluating how to be a good mama to her. As she gets older, my role evolves and changes.

    I can’t believe I just watched her 5th grade promotion, and she’s now officially a middle schooler!

    xoxo